Why it was so important to make changes early

Josh's transformation has not only made him a calmer person, but it has also brought him and his daughter closer together. He explains the importance of making the changes early.

Soft piano music plays continuously in the background for the duration of the film. On a black screen is the text ‘Warning. This video contains coarse language and discussions of violence. Viewer discretion is advised.’

Josh, a pākehā guy with dark blonde hair walks hand in hand with his daughter. Josh is wearing a black sweatshirt with a traditional Māori design on it in white, and black pants. His daughter, whose face is not shown throughout the video, has chin length blonde hair. She is wearing a blue sweatshirt, leopard print leggings and red framed glasses, and looks about four years old.

Josh: “I am Josh and I've just hit the 30 mark.”

Cut to Josh and his daughter in a bird enclosure at a zoo, watching a kererū fly. The scene is in slow motion. White text says, ‘staying on track’.

Josh: “I have high expectations of what I should be able to do. Like even now like I'm … I'm trying to do little DIYs at home …”

Cut to Josh in sitting in the lounge of a community centre.

Josh: “…and in my mind I have ‘I'm going to do it this way’, and then I start doing it and I'm like ‘ah for [ __ ] sake why is it not working?’ … like, in my mind I've got it working, and it's not - reality ain't coming out.”

Cut to Josh, standing under a huge tree in the park and holding his daughter. She hugs his neck.

Josh: “Just a lot more calmer and a lot more open to ‘hasn't worked out, that's okay, it's not the end of the freaking world is it?’ You know, like, we're okay again.”

Cut to Josh in the lounge.

Josh: “We're not here for long on this earth and we've just gotta take every day and be better.”

Cut to Josh and his daughter playing in a playground, in slow motion. They spin on the roundabout ride and he pushes her on a swing, and catches her at the bottom of a slide.

Josh: “My little girl, what she sees in me now … I guess the reaction when I come and see her, every now and then she's running from whatever room she's in … going "Dad!" … it's an excitement, and seeing that is great.”

Cut to Josh in the lounge.

Josh: “For me, the early signs, and being able to implement those changes really early and it hasn't robbed me of too much time with my family or friends. Because … time's everything in this world that we live in. I'm just so thankful that I'm being able to make the changes early. 

The contribution of other people and the change - to be honest it would be probably my daughter’s mother. She recognised what I wanted to achieve and she's like ‘okay, so we're not going to allow that to happen again.’ But it was actually the great freedom of being able to just pop in whenever I needed. So, you know, we're in a 21st century world, and we have co-parenting now [Josh makes quote marks with his fingers], and that works well. I pop in, she comes in, whenever we need each other and stuff, so that was the biggest person.

And to be fair, my parents as well. For mum, if I'm giving her a call and saying, ‘something's not quite right’ she'll say, ‘Oh go give Chris a call, or go to someone else a call, because [it’s] a little bit past me.’ And that's what I do, I give him a buzz, and generally that's enough.”

Cut to Josh outside the community centre with Chris, who is an older Māori man. He is wearing a grey-green beanie, glasses, and the same sweatshirt as Josh. They have their arms around each other’s shoulders.

Josh: “You know my dad has the other aspect, he's the positive ‘Yeah you're okay, you know, you're doing it.’  A man of few words but that's cool, on the same path, which is great. That's what I needed.

Josh: “Before I would be like ‘oh [ __ ] sake’ you know, and I'm just like ‘oh bother’ you know like ‘oh no’.” 

Cut to a black background, white words appear. "In your hands. Change starts here.  For you and your whānau. If you think it might be time to change your behaviour, you’re in the right place. Your journey isn’t a straight line, but practice can get you where you want to go.”

More to Watch

Staying on Track Playlist

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Josh's story

Josh's Story

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Josh - Thinking About Change
Josh - Taking Steps for Change

Change Journey Playlists

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